It's Sunday afternoon and I have been lying on my dad's restored Swedish sofa, in my den, trying to relax and have a nanna nap - to no avail. I cannot switch my brain off. It's impossible. Lately, I've been waking up at 3am and doing the same then. No wonder I am a bit exhausted! This morning I ran 14km along the river, but I found it really, really hard. I was feeling completely despondent about it until I remembered that it has only been two weeks since I ran the Brisbane Half Marathon, so I need to cut myself some slack as I recover from that. The photos from that event have come through now and let me share them with you, dear readers. Are you ready for some serious UGLY? Here goes.... On second thoughts, I just can't do it to you. I really can't. I will share this one, because it's not so gruesome (only my top half is showing). You may recognise some of my running buddies. We all ran the 21kms and this was taken in the finishing area, when we were all utterly shagged.
I'm all about my appearance lately. It happens every year around this time. In this photo, for example, I am shocked at how LARGE I am... I thought Mo & I were about the same height but not so. And I suppose no-one can really look good after running that distance. And there is no Photoshop in my computer. And the runners in those running magazines have had the benefit of good lighting, makeup, Photoshop and youth, right?
Okay. I have never been one to particularly worry about my appearance but for some reason, I can't bear to see photos of me running. It really, really gets me down. Speaking of photos and "adjustments", take a peek at these two photos of Australia's Jennifer Hawkins (Miss Universe 2004). She is barely recognisable from the cheerleader she was!!
So, as I approach my half-century, at a time when I shouldn't give a toss what I look like but should, in fact, be "comfortable with my body", I am getting all twitchy about my appearance. This, after 40 years of no front tooth! What is this all about? I am also detecting some jowl-like action and a crepey neck! Arrrrggghhhhh. Why do I care? I should be rejoicing in the fact that I CAN run 21.1kms and that this week I coached my first running group. What a fool I am...... I think I will watch that divine YouTube video of the soldier's homecomings again, just to put some perspective back into my life. Cheerio! This will be me in 20 years, I've decided.